middleman pt.2

Two Sundays ago Jenn announced that she and I have resigned our staff positions at New Albany Nazarene. Jenn has accepted the position of children's pastor at Newark Nazarene and we hope to resume The Gathering in the fall in Newark. The past two years of ministry have been a time of great growth and struggle for us and we are grateful for the opportunity we have had to find great friends and be a part of a spiritual community that truly does life together. We are excited to continue to serve with our friends in a new setting.

I continue to feel as though I am somewhat out of place. I had begun to find myself once again becoming anxious and unsettled because my lack of vocational stability. The bike shop is fun and it is definitely helping pay the bills but it is not a long-term solution. I am beginning to think that there are no long-term solutions, thus the title of my last two posts and the song lyrics below. I continue to find my self standing firmly on middle ground most of the time these days. In my last post I hoped to convey that I am trying to find common ground (I have found little) between my Mormon co-workers and myself. I talk to them about the scriptures and about Jesus and try to avoid debate and instead focus on what we have in common.

I have read two books by Thich Nhat Hanh over the last month and he has imparted some practical ways that I can live with and embrace my anxiety and feeling about my vocation. Even though I have not had a paying pastoral position in the last year I have been able to move closer to living out the kingdom than ever before. With the Thay's wisdom I hope to practice mindfulness and peace with more focus and intention. Thay refers to the Buddhism he practices as "Engaged Buddhism". I think that would be good for followers of Christ to become more focused on practicing "Engaged Christianity".

If you have not read Thich Nhat Hanh's writings check out, "Creating True Peace: Ending Violence in Yourself. Your Family, Your Community, and the World".


I traveled though the atmosphere as a wall of feedback climbed
The pegs were gold, the band was old, they played in half time
Now every dream gets whittled down just like every fool gets wise
You will never reap of any seed deprived of sunlight

So I have become the Middleman
The gray areas are mine
The in-between, the absentee
Is a beautiful disguise

So I keep my footlights shining bright just like I keep my exits wide
'Cause I never know when it's time to go, it's too crowded now inside
The dead can hide beneath the ground and the birds can always fly
But the rest of us do what we must in constant compromise

So I have become the Middleman
The gray areas are fine
The "I don't know," the "maybe so"
Is the only real reply
It is the only true reply

Bright Eyes, Middleman